happy birthday, grandmom

There's nothing quite like splitting a bottle of wine with a friend and then being awoken the next morning at 8am by a screeching, grinding tile cutter outside your window! I understand the man redoing R.'s bathroom can only work weekends, but it's very cruel to fire up the machine so early on a Sunday. The commotion not only woke up me and the pups but also Almendena's 3-year-old cranky grandson Martin, whose family visits nearly every weekend. I've never known a young child to cry and fuss as much as Martin. He's at his worst at dinnertime; without fail, he throws at tantrum at 2:15 every Sunday. Apparently he doesn't think much of his grandmother's cooking. Almendena then attempts to cajole him to eat by singing Spanish pop tunes, which only makes him yell louder. Is it any wonder Big Jim and I looked forward to our Sunday beach trips so much.... Had a very nice evening with L. She made spaghetti with a really good, rich meat ragu. I usually make a simple marinara of tomatoes, olive oil, garlic, and fresh basil, so her sauce was a nice change. She also made a simple salad, and we had some good Manchego cheese and grapes for dessert. Excellent meal. As I've mentioned before, L. is a fascinating person with many stories to tell, so the conversation was lively. She also has decided if Bush is reelected, she is selling her house in Brooklyn and moving to Spain fulltime and never returning to the US. And I thought I was angry about the current state of affairs! Today my grandmother is celebrating her 93rd birthday. Last night as L. and I discussed how the world has changed during her 78 years, I couldn't help but think how much my grandmother has seen in her 93! Indoor plumbing for one. But seriously, when my grandmother was born women couldn't even vote. She has lived through the World Wars, the second of which took the life of one brother and wounded her second brother twice. Cars, planes, television, VCRs, CDs, computers, electric kitchen appliances, credit cards. My grandmother went to university and was a teacher for 36 years. When she first became a teacher, the job was for unmarried women; therefore, when she married my grandfather, her career ended temporarily. This changed during WWII, when she was asked to teach again. She then wasn't just responsible for teaching students, however. She was also the school janitor and maintenance staff, in charge of keeping the floors clean and the coal fire burning. At 93, my grandmother remains the matriarch in every sense. Although her mobility is severly limited by arthritis, she still rules the family from her plaid tweed recliner. She's a complicated person, simultaneously frail and hard as nails. Her doctors are amazed by her overall good health and excellent mental faculties. She occasionally appears confused by conversation but that's simply because vanity prevents her from wearing a hearing aid. My grandmother lives in the four-bedroom Sears&Roebuck prefab house she shared with my grandfather. She has live-in nurses who help get her in and out of bed, make her meals, do her laundry, and my mother and uncle spend half their weeks running her errands and taking her to doctors' appointments. It's been difficult to watch her lose much of her independence, but she would very much like to live her final years in the house, as my grandfather did, so my mother and uncle work very hard to make that possible. Last year, our family had to face her inevitable mortality when she became sick with pneumonia and her heart and kidneys began to fail. The doctors told us it was a matter of days. I flew back to the US straightaway to find that Grandmom, being Grandmom, had defied medicine and was making an amazing recovery. My grandmother, like Big Jim, likes to talk. We always joked that God wasn't going to let her die because he wanted some peace and quiet in heaven for just a bit longer. I feel fortunate to have the relationship I do with her, and each of her birthdays serves as a reminder to me of all that she has achieved and overcome in her long life. I am grateful that she is still able to watch (and be disgusted by the disappointing play of) her beloved Philadelphia Phillies, enjoys shooting the crap with her even crazier cousin Hedy, and continues to crochet her trademark tea towels and dish rags. Today I wish for her another year of good health and happiness, and I warn the powers above not to take her from the earth until they are absolutely sure they know what they are getting themselves into. Happy birthday, Grandmom :-) hasta pronto, mylifeinspain